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Body Image Lessons From A Hypocrite

My oldest daughter is 9 so we’ve had many You-and-Your-Body discussions lately. I get a bit squirrely about some of her questions so, being the big chicken that I am, I bought her a book.

It’s called “The Care & Keeping of You,” and believe it or not it’s from the American Girl Doll people. My friends kept raving about it so I grabbed it and now I see why. It covers everything from how to floss to how to use a tampon. Prepare yourself for that last one because it’s pretty graphic. That particular diagram led my daughter and I to our most recent BODY conversation. Continue reading →

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MADEWELL: Trade Your Old Jeans in For New Jeans (that fit better!)

I felt pretty stupid the first time I walked into Madewell because everyone there seemed about 20 years younger than me. I took a cursory look around and then ran the hell out because I was worried my dentures would fall out or my Depends would start leaking. I went BACK though, on a Tuesday at 10am when no one was there and I found my favorite store in the world. Continue reading →

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Lucy-isms Vol. 1- WHAT Did She Just Say?

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I think my youngest daughter Lucy might be an alien. Ever since she was old enough to speak, she has said the strangest things. Take, for instance, the picture above. Lucy made that for Thanksgiving in Kindergarten. I don’t know what it’s supposed to be but it is, at once, awesome and terrifying.

Let me be clear. Lucy is a very smart girl and she gets good grades. Her brain just works differently than most. I realized this when she was about 3 and her sister asked what we were having for dinner. Lucy said, “We’re having hot dogs, Pull-Ups and Chicken Chokes.” Continue reading →

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How to Make a Kid Shut Up

There’s a horrible reality about parenting. Sometimes we wish our kids would just shut the hell up.

A child who has your attention will talk continuously and it’s usually about something like “My Little Pony” or Minecraft. You, as a loving parent (who wants to keep future therapy bills to a minimum) will smile and nod and do your best to keep up. Yes, because a child who is telling you A VERY IMPORTANT STORY will stop occasionally to make sure you are listening so you can’t zone out and make a mental list of shoes you’d like to buy. That’s why you listen and keep listening until you can distract the child long enough to escape the room.

I have found a way to stop all of that. Continue reading →

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Open Letter to My Friend Who’s Turning 40

I am so excited about celebrating your 40th Birthday this weekend, but I know you have mixed emotions. Crossing over from your 30s into your 40s isn’t exactly FUN. Believe me, anyone who says they’re excited about it is secretly crying into a bottle of vodka. There ARE some good things about turning 40 though and I would know. I’ve been in my 40s so long that I’m already mentally-preparing for my 50s, so here’s my birthday present to you. It’s a brief list of the things you actually have to look forward to when you turn 40. Continue reading →

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Is “Trinity Groves” Really Family Friendly? We Put It to the Test!

Trinity Groves describes itself as a “restaurant, retail, artist and entertainment” destination. I got that directly from their website: http://www.trinitygroves.com/

I think we’re all AWARE that there’s a cool collection of restaurants over by the Margaret Hunt Hill Bridge but most of my friends don’t frequent that area. That’s because most of us have kids and feel like we can’t take them to hip eateries because they’ll complain loudly if there aren’t chicken tenders. Trinity Groves CLAIMS to be a family destination though and encourages people to bring their kids so I took them up on the challenge. For the record, my kids think that Chicken Tenders qualify as Mexican AND Chinese food, because that’s what they order everywhere. Continue reading →

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A Domed Ski Resort in TX? Can We Call It Logan’s Run?

Am I the only person in the world who is kind of excited about ski-slopes in Grand Prairie?

Have you heard about this? It’s a $215 million dollar project called The Grand Alps Resort which promises year-round skiing and a Hard Rock Hotel next door. Here’s a link to the most recent story in the Dallas Morning News:

http://www.dallasnews.com/news/metro/20141230-vote-on-grand-prairie-indoor-ski-resort-coming-as-soon-as-january.ece

There are already TONS complaints about this proposed resort, some more coherent than others. Some people are worried about the impact it would have on the environment and the lost funds if it fails, but most people just seem to think it’s a stupid idea. Continue reading →

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New Year’s Resolutions: Make-Up, Kayaks & Lady-Boners

If you ran into me on this day in 2013 and asked where I thought I’d be in a year, I would’ve been WAY off. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve lived through BAD years and I know that 2014 doesn’t qualify as one, but it definitely could’ve ended on a higher note.  That’s why I’m making New Year’s Resolutions for 2015.  I don’t usually believe in resolutions because I think you should change things whenever you want. Waiting for a new year seems pointless, right? But it’s appropriate for me now because someone tore my life into little pieces & threw it up in the air. I’m just lucky because now I get to piece it back together into a pattern I really like. Continue reading →

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Holidays at The Hoyts

My very first memory EVER is of Christmas in Conway, Arkansas with my Granny and Grandpa Hoyt. I remember arriving at their house after a long drive and seeing the Christmas tree right as we walked in the door. I must have been tiny because I remember someone handing me to my Grandfather. He held me next to the tree so I could see the lights and my mind was BLOWN. Clearly, since I remember it so many years later. Continue reading →

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And Then I Built a Website…

Lots of big changes have come my way lately and I’ve suddenly found myself without a platform. This is WILDLY frustrating for someone who has made a living by broadcasting my thoughts for almost 25 years.  That is why I’m taking to the internet and building my own stage. This has turned into a slow and sloppy process which, let’s be honest, is the only way I do anything anymore.

Please bear with me while I figure out the bells & whistles but I plan to use this page as my microphone. I’ll be sharing blogs, recipes and reviews of everything I need to voice an opinion about. I appreciate any feedback you have to offer, as long as it isn’t along the lines of “Yr fat & UGLY.”

Happy Holidays and if you have time check out the recipe I just posted. It’s for my Mom’s Rum Balls and I’ve issued a challenge. There’s gotta be a way to get drunk off these things. We just have to figure out how many to EAT!