The Rock & Depp

MOMMY MOVIE REVIEW: Are “Baywatch” or “Pirates of the Caribbean 5” OK for Kids?

Memorial Day Weekend seems like the perfect time to take your family to the movies, but picking a flick that’s worth the money AND appropriate for your whole crew can be tricky. That’s especially true in regards to this weekend’s new releases, Baywatch and Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales. While one of these would be fine for you and most of your kids, the other will teach them interesting new terms for certain body-parts.

Baywatch stars Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and Zac Efron as lifeguards whose personalities clash while solving beach-side crimes. It’s like the TV show in that they all wear unforgiving red bathing suits, but the similarities end there. Writers must have realized early on that they had limited funny material, so they loaded the plot with nudity, penis-jokes and F-bombs. It’s disappointing because, with a little attention to the script and a focus on action sequences, Baywatch could have been a solid PG-13 picture. Instead, it’s unforgivably NOT funny and something I can’t recommend for the whole family. Yes, it IS rated R but I saw plenty of youngsters at the Baywatch screening I attended, so it feels worthy of mentioning.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales might not be the freshest entry for that franchise, but it IS a solid option for families looking for a Memorial Day movie. Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) must find the Trident of Poseidon this time, in hopes of battling a deadly sea-ghost (Javier Bardem). He joins forces with a young sailor and a beautiful astronomer, who hearken back to the days of Keira Knightley and Orlando Bloom. Yes, this movie feels oddly familiar (like you’ve seen it four times already) and Depp appears to be half-asleep, but kids who have followed the series will enjoy it. Pirates of the Caribbean 5 also wraps up some loose ends from earlier pictures, playing into the promise that this is the last one. It’s rated PG-13, so there is gore, violence and some scary SCARY ghosts, but nothing worse than the earlier Pirates movies. Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales would be the movie I’d recommend for families this weekend, assuming you haven’t already seen Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 at least 3 times.

BaywatchRated R Find Tickets
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales Rated PG-13 Find Tickets

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