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BLOG: Tales from My SECRET Facebook Page

I belong to a secret Facebook group. I’ve talked about these people before (see My Secret Shame Part 1 and Part 2) and love them all dearly, even though I’ve only met one of them in person. They allowed me into their faction because I possess a similarly filthy mind and will openly discuss matters that should really only be shared with a therapist, if even then. These secret online conversations get especially raucous on Friday nights, when we are all exhausted from a full week of working/parenting/faking it and break into the alcohol. Feeds fill up with pictures of cocktails and dicussions about people we’d like to murder, have sex with or both. One woman snaps secret photos of her father-in-law’s feet and posts them, so we can all discuss exactly what the hell is going on there.

Is he turning into a werewolf? Or maybe a centaur?
Is he turning into a werewolf? Or maybe a centaur?
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BLOG: Birthdays In The Social Media Age

I don’t understand people who aren’t on Facebook. They say they’re too busy for such nonsense and don’t want the world prying into their personal lives, but I still don’t get it. How do they find out who their ex-boyfriends ended up marrying or who gained lots of weight? How do they conduct a proper background check on potential suitors or quietly stalk that girl from high school they were always so jealous of?

More importantly, how does everyone know when it’s their birthday? Continue reading →

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BLOG: My Secret Shame-Part Deux

I posted what had to be the NASTIEST blog I’ve ever put on this website last week and it was written almost entirely by other people. I belong to a secret Facebook Group that has been sharing their “Secret Shames,” so I wrote a blog based on them. Far more people read that post than ANYTHING ELSE I’VE EVER WRITTEN! So, I guess you people are sick in the head…just like me.

Here’s Round 2 but remember, they are foul. Like really really FOUL. There are countless swear words and yes, even more poop-talk. I also feel the need to apologize to Little People because…well, you’ll see why after reading it. Enjoy! Continue reading →