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MOVIE REVIEWS: “10 Cloverfield Lane” “The Brothers Grimsby” & “Hello, My Name is Doris”

I spent most of this week at the beach, enjoying the view above so I sadly didn’t get to see any movies. I was still really excited to hear about two in particular though, 10 Cloverfield Lane and Sacha Baron Cohen’s latest comedy, The Brothers Grimsby. I can’t tell you how furious I was when the first review I clicked on (in Variety, to be specific) gave away ALL OF THE MAJOR SECRETS IN 10 CLOVERFIELD LANE! I mean, he just BLABBED about everything in his first paragraph so it’s essentially ruined for me. Hopefully that hasn’t happened to YOU because I found an excellent spoiler free review on www.BigFanboy.com by Ronnie Malik. You can read that by clicking HERE.
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I’m sad to say that the reviews of The Brothers Grimsby aren’t quite as glowing. Critics universally agree that it sucks, though I feel Sacha Baron Cohen deserves some credit for those side-burns. I’m sharing the New York Times review from Manohla Dargis, because of this quote…which is awesome: “While there may be comedy gold in an elephant’s vagina, Mr. Cohen fails to find it here.” You can read the rest of her review by clicking HERE.
11BROTHERS-master675 Continue reading →

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FREE MOVIE PASSES: See “Miracles From Heaven” On Me!

Miracles From Heaven has everything a parent could want. It has inspirational messages about faith and hope and how miracles can sometimes be found in the most unexpected places. It also stars Jennifer Garner as a desperate mother, and I think we’re all cheering for Ms. Garner right now. In fact, someone just sent me this short of her reading Go the F*ck to Sleep and it’s about the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.

I imagine Jennifer Garner has cleaned up her language a great deal for Miracles From Heaven so click HERE to snag free passes to that and then watch the trailer. Oh don’t worry, this one IS safe for work!

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FREE MOVIE PASSES: See “10 Cloverfield Lane” On Me!

Holy Crap!

I just watched the trailer for 10 Cloverfield Lane again and got chills up and down my arms! What the hell is happening here? Speculation has run the gamut and the fact that J.J. Abrams is a producer has added to the obvious Cloverfield monster-movie connections. I can tell you that my research (meaning the 5 minutes I just spent on Google) determined that this project was around long before it was attached to Abrams and that there was originally no mention of monsters. That honestly tells us nothing so instead of speculating any further, just grab free passes to see 10 Cloverfield Lane by clicking HERE, then watch that freaky trailer again. Seriously, what the hell is happening here?!!!

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FREE MOVIE PASSES: See “Zootopia” On Me!

I’ve made it abundantly clear that I LOVED Zootopia, right? Click HERE to read my review of it but all you really need to know is that it’s fantastic and that I gave Zootopia an A+. Yes, I’m aware that’s the second A+ I’ve given in recent weeks (I was pretty crazy about Deadpool too) but I’m not getting soft. That’s just how good Zootopia is and best of all I HAVE FREE PASSES! Click right HERE to grab those and then watch the trailer with me again. Omigod, THAT SLOTH!

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FREE MOVIE PASSES: See “Whiskey Tango Foxtrot” On Me!

Everything about Whiskey Tango Foxtrot makes me tingly.

It’s based on the real experiences of Kim Barker, a journalist who worked in Afghanistan and Pakistan during Operation Enduring Freedom. Barker wrote a book called The Taliban Shuffle: Strange Days in Afghanistan and Pakistan and Tina Fey’s production company Little Stranger picked it up. The screenplay was written by Robert Carlock (30 Rock, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt) AND it’s produced by Lorne Michaels. Best of all, Tina Fey PLAYS Kim Barker and she has a weird affair with Martin Freeman (who will ALWAYS be Bilbo Baggins in my book). Pretty much nothing but gold there, right? Well, just in case it isn’t, why don’t we all see Whiskey Tango Foxtrot FOR FREE? I have passes to a screening on March 1st so click HERE to snag those and then watch the trailer. I mean, Whiskey Tango Foxtrot HAS to be good, right? Oh shit, I just got chills watching the trailer again.

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FREE MOVIE PASSES: See “Zoolander 2” On Me!

Wanna know a secret?

I’ve never seen Zoolander. I don’t know how the Hell it happened, but I somehow got this far in my life without seeing the Magnum, the Ferrari, or even THE BLUE STEEL. People are always shocked to hear this and in some ways, I feel like I shouldn’t even bother now. Maybe it could be my thing. Well, I’d better decide soon because the Zoolander 2 screening is this upcoming Tuesday and I’VE GOT FREE PASSES! Just click HERE for those and then watch the trailer below. Omigod, we have to go, just to watch Benedict Cumberbatch play ALL!

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FREE MOVIE PASSES: See “The Forest,” About Japan’s REAL Suicide Forest

My niece Caroline came to visit recently and was gushing about a movie she’s dying to see. It was something about a woman who goes searching for her twin sister in a real-life area of Japan called The Suicide Forest, but that’s all I remember. Honestly, I was overwhelmed with Star Wars: The Force Awakens fever at the time so I really only heard about 35% of what she said. Here I am though, only a few weeks later, getting REALLY excited about The Forest.

This film stars Natalie Dormer (Game of Thrones, The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1 & 2) as Sara, a woman whose twin sister (also played by Dormer) goes missing in Japan’s Aokigahara Forest. It’s known as The Suicide Forest because of the number of people who go there each year, to kill themselves (it’s 2nd only to the San Francisco Bridge in annual suicides). Legends claim that the woods are haunted and that not everyone who entered at the base of Mount Fuji actually planned to kill themselves. It’s just what happened, after the spirits got to them.

Even the stars of the film were overwhelmed by the Aokigahara Forest. Taylor Kinney (Chicago Fire) plays Sara‘s friend Aiden, and he got a little freaked out when his compass and cell-phone stopped working. Plus, the remains of some of the people who took their lives are still there, scattered amongst the trees. Director Jason Zada said guides who took him into the forest rubbed salt on their backs, so the souls of those left there couldn’t ride them out. Zada rubbed salt on his back too, just in case.

It sounds like great material, but will The Forest be a great movie? Find out for yourself by printing out THIS PASS and then watch the trailer for The Forest below. DON’T FORGET: This pass will get you and a guest in for free but it DOES NOT GUARANTEE YOUR SEAT. Get there early or your date might want to drag YOU into a haunted forest!

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FREE MOVIE PASSES: See the Oscar-Buzzy “Brooklyn” On Me!

I have a friend who likes to say, “They don’t make movies with GOOD STORIES these days. No one makes Seabiscuit anymore!” While I don’t totally agree with him, I know he’s not the only person who feels that way. That’s why everyone’s going to be super excited about Brooklyn, which opens nationwide on Friday, November 20th. That’s the same weekend that The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2 comes out so it would be easy to overlook Brooklyn. DON’T DO THAT because it’s already one of highest reviewed films of the year. Some critics are even saying that it’s impossible to NOT like Brooklyn, which almost sounds like a challenge, doesn’t it?

Brooklyn tells the story of a young, Irish immigrant who lands in 1950’s New York. She finds happiness and love but soon has important, life-altering choices to make. Saoirse Ronan plays Ellis, the young immigrant and the rumor mill says she’s guaranteed an Oscar nomination for this role. Guess I’ll have to learn how to pronounce her name after all.

The best part of all of this is that I have free passes to see Brooklyn so you can STILL save your ticket money for Katniss! Just click HERE for those, then take a minute to watch the trailer. Dammit, I’m already weepy!

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FREE MOVIE PASSES: See “Our Brand Is Crisis” for FREE!

I’m pretty sure that, given the chance, Sandra Bullock and I would be BEST FRIENDS.

I can just imagine her coming over to my house, where we’d play UNO and talk about boys while our kids played basketball in the driveway. Maybe I’d open some wine and she’d braid my hair while we prank called Melissa McCarthy. Then we’d watch Love Potion #9 together and she’d tell me all about the celebrities she’s slept with and rate their performance.

What? Did I make it weird?

Well, it doesn’t matter because the closest any of us will be getting to Sandra Bullock is when her next movie, Our Brand Is Crisis comes out October 30th. Bullock plays a political strategist who retires due to a scandal, then returns to fight her nemesis, played by Billy Bob Thornton.

The cool thing about Our Brand Is Crisis is that George Clooney produced it and was supposed to play the main character. He gave it to Sandy instead when she told him how frustrated she was about the lack of solid female roles. That’s a pretty cool friend, isn’t it? I wonder if those two have ever hooked up? Am I making it weird again?

Well, I have free passes to see Our Brand Is Crisis at the Angelika in Dallas next week. Just click HERE to snag those and don’t forget to show up a little early in case there’s a line. I’ll be there too, so maybe WE can braid each other’s hair and talk about boys. Ooo, and do YOU have Melissa McCarthy’s phone number? Because I’d REALLY like to prank call her.

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FREE MOVIE PASSES: See Oscar Contender “Room” With It’s Author!

Room stars Brie Larson as a woman who is held captive in a 10-by-10 foot space with her young son. She does everything she can to help him lead a normal life, until the day they try to escape. This brings mother and son to the biggest challenge they’ve ever faced: the outside world.

Room is based on the best-selling novel of the same name, written by Emma Donoghue. It’s a work of fiction, but Donoghue based her book on the harrowing true stories of Jaycee Dugard and Elisabeth Fritzi. Both of these women were kidnapped and held in hidden rooms for years. They were also repeatedly raped and eventually gave birth while still in captivity.

The big screen version of Room is already getting Oscar buzz, specifically for Brie Larson’s performance. It also won the Toronto International Film Festival this year, which has a history of picking Academy Award Best Picture contenders. There’s even a fair amount of Oscar chatter for young Jacob Tremblay, who plays the movie’s 5-year-old boy.

Best of all, I have free passes to see Room and guess who’ll be sitting in the audience with you? Author Emma Donoghue will be at the screening too, so make sure you stick around for the Q&A after the movie. Take a minute to watch the trailer, then print out your pass to get in. You should probably bring some tissues too because this one looks like a weeper!
Click HERE for your passes!