There are quite a few new movies out this week so I had to make some updates to my list. Unfortunately, not ALL of the new releases made it into the Top 8 Movies, but I was really surprised by the ones that did.
8. Don’t take your kids to see Sausage Party. Yes, it’s animated but if you DO they will be introduced to some of the filthiest and most creative profanity ever. On that same note, don’t take your mother-in-law, or Pastor, or Granny…unless she’s a cool Granny. You know that Uncle who still gets dirty magazines in the mail? Take him to see Sausage Party.
(WARNING: This trailer is NSFW!)
7. OK, Blair Witch isn’t for everyone. It’s predictable, occasionally slow and essentially a carbon copy of The Blair Witch Project of 1999. If you loved that movie though, and like the idea of revisiting it through the eyes of a bright new Director (Adam Wingard), then Blair Witch might be right up your alley. You might even giggle and scream so much that you annoy the people sitting next to you. Wait, that was me.
6. Is there a Meryl Streep BACKLASH happening? I’ve talked to multiple people who DON’T want to see Florence Foster Jenkins because they’re tired of watching Streep act surprised about her Oscar nominations. It’s a pretty strange response to good work, if you ask me, but Meryl Streep isn’t the only good thing about Florence Foster Jenkins. In fact, I was more blown away by Hugh Grant’s turn as her charming-but-dodgy husband and ESPECIALLY by Simon Helberg’s performance as her pianist. Look, Florence Foster Jenkins is just a great movie with great actors, so release the hate and go see it.
5. Why should you see the movie Don’t Breathe? Well, instead of giving you a summary and telling you about actors you’ve never heard of, why don’t you just watch the trailer below? If you can get through THAT without wanting to see Don’t Breathe, then I simply don’t understand you.
4. Look, Kubo and the Two Strings won’t be in theaters forever and it was MADE for the big screen. The stop-motion animation Laika Studios used to film it was designed with 3D in mind. It takes an already gorgeous movie to a whole new level and one that probably won’t be appreciated in your living room. Spend the extra cash for Dolby Cinema too if you can, because it definitely adds to the Kubo and the Two Strings experience.
3. I thought that I was going to hate Bridget Jones’s Baby, but it was so refreshing and funny that I completely forgot to. In fact, it took me a full 24-hours to realize I’d watched yet ANOTHER will-they-or-won’t-they story about Bridget Jones and Mark Darcy, and even then I didn’t care.
2. It was about 15 minutes into Hell or High Water when I realized I was completely, deeply, and HOPELESSLY in love with every single character on the screen. It’s a modern day Western where men rob banks to save their land and Jeff Bridges plays the Texas Ranger who tracks them. Hell or High Water will ring especially true to those of us who’ve spent time in those dying West Texas towns shown onscreen. Man, just watching this trailer makes we want to see it AGAIN!
1. I love a movie that tells a great story, but does it quickly and without unnecessary embellishments. Sully is the epitome of getting-to-the-point, thanks to Director Clint Eastwood’s no-nonsense style and Tom Hanks’ understated performance as Captain Chesley Sullenberger. Yes, you know how this story ends but you probably don’t know what happened behind the scenes of the Miracle on the Hudson. Sully is a wonderful portrait of everyday heroism because the PILOT certainly wasn’t the only hero that day.
I hope this list helps you find the PERFECT MOVIE, but remember to check back next week. Deepwater Horizon is coming out on 9/30, along with Masterminds starring Kristen Wiig and Zach Galifianakis! And remember, with my help you’ll never EVER have to spend another dollar on a BAD MOVIE!